Falling in Love (Again)

I realized something: I'm falling in love with Scooter all over again. Not talking to him for a day is torture. I cried my eyes out this morning over something stupid related to him and now that I've sat around and thought things out and did lots of soul searching, I realized that I am so madly, deeply, and insanely in love with him. It's the most amazing feeling, knowing that someone has so much of my heart. And I can't stand that he's not here with me right now to sleep next to me or hold me or kiss me.

I never want him to go away. And I know that that sounds so naive, but it's true. I don't want anyone else. I'm in love with him and everything that is him. I never want to be the bitch I was being to him. I don't want to push him away, or try to push him away. I'm tired of trying to block out my feelings, to make my emotions stick to nothingness. I'm stepping outside of those walls and I'm trying to beat them down. We are going to make this work and I am going to keep him for mine forever.

Scooter, you are the love of my life. And I do not doubt this. No one will ever have my heart like you have. I never knew what love could feel like until I met you and until you returned it. These feelings are so strong and so unexplained, but I know now exactly what love is. And I know that I feel it with you. And I know that you are my everything and I wouldn't trade you for the world.

I used to be so afraid. I used to think that the trust and the love and the falling and the happily ever after wasn't real. But I know that you're my best friend, you're my boyfriend, you're perfect and fantastic and you make me smile like it's going out of style. You even make me rhyme to prove a point. My heart is in your hands and I know that you're going to take care of it because that's just what you do.

I'm done getting mad at you for no reason and forcing myself to hate you for little things. The truth is, I could never hate you. You're the best thing in my life and I wouldn't trade you for the world.

My goodness. I am so in love with you!